Mostly to stop you having fun and to give narrow-minded 'job's worth' types a deluded sense of self-importance. These are exactly the reasons we here at GRILLUST™ love rules so much.
We expect our students to abide by a strict code of studio conduct. This is enforced by the prominent display of this poster at various points around the studio ...
We know you will both understand and agree that a studio is no place for:
- Jumping off the balcony into the 'deep end' (this both splashes and frightens the younger students)
- Full-scale polyvinyl inflatables of space craft and ocean liners (as this blocks out the light)
- The physical demonstration of affection (we're not 'Performing Arts' types for goodness sake...)
- 'Feature' underwear of any kind and/or bottom cleavage display (out of sight, is out of mind when it comes to the nether regions)
- Badly designed type faces (of any kind)
The punishment for all miscreants is suitably dreadful: one week's hard labour in our leader, Captain Davies', bicycle repair workshop stripping and re-greasing Sturmey-Archer three-speed gear mechanisms.
Currently 'doing time' we have...
...Jasper Van Looveren-Baines (12) for some blatant bombing...
...and Matt Swales and Fionn Jordan (both 12) who were apprehended whilst engaging in a little 'light petting'.
WE WILL BE OBEYED!
That is all...
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